2/1/26 – Low Abdominal Work
First day of February! I’m very tired this morning! My body needs rest, to say the least!
So as I’m working my body more and more into supine extension, I notice something! It’s almost like my low, loww abdomen is what’s helping brace my torso to create safe passage for my airways during hip and knee extension! When I lose connection with that low abdominal area, my left leg will spasm, and I need to restart my extension process! So interesting!
Also too, I can’t “fight it” or “force it” meaning I can’t fight my legs into extension. They slip and push more into extension during an exhale and when I least expect it!? So interesting! I’m definitely holding my torso strong to help initiate and keep my legs straight, but I can’t seem to force my way into full extension?
As I’m working on my breath, I can feel the lower left abdominal area bracing during these movements. I have to work on relaxing that area, while simultaneously keeping it engaged. I keep trying to slowly dip more and more into a fuller and fuller breath, and that is when I feel my body slowly creak and start to change!
I can reallyy feel my lower abdominal region waking up and trying to hold my legs while in extension, it’s so interesting, I’ve never quite thought of my abs like this before? Almost like I’m rebuilding a mental model for what these muscles do, one day at a time.
I really think I need to continue working on low abdomen engagement and recruitment! I can feel it ramping up, and it’s helping my legs in extension more and more with each set I feel!
Dang wow, this is some INTENSE quad activation in the standing frame! It’s honestly feeling like some of the most to date! This is pretty incredible!
How are fasical tissues innervated? This book, Born To Walk, has been so fascinating! Thinking about how when we walk our muscles are mostly isometrically contracted, and don’t change length much at all, is actually really fascinating?! I think this reinforces the fact I should get up in the standing frame each day!
Well that was less than ideal. I broke some stuffs.. hmm… that’s not ideal. Time to get some material on order! My braces seemed to not like the modifications they were needed for my legs… shoot!
2/2/26 – Manageable Bites
I’m tired. I can feel it. My legs though, they are ready and fired up! I can feel the slightest amount of instability or adjustment in my trunk / torso, realllyy lends to how my legs move or push out! It’s honestly really interesting! I can feel the whole hip complex coming back online, to say the least! Better get up, lots to do today!
So Ashley said I need to get more side planks in, “reach thru’s”, and cross-body activation. Nina said I need to be getting prone, so some prone and regular plank work sounds to be in store. So much to do, but I need to break it down, in to manageable bites!
2/3/26 – Breath of Light Breathing Patterns
This is AMAZING! This has to be the most extended my legs have been in the hips and knees to date! They’ve been relaxing so much more, and extending out! They still are spasming quite a bit, but I’ve really been working the “relaxation” part, and it’s been helping so much!
Also too, I felt this interesting “numbing” feeling in my left pinky and ring finger, I think it’s my radial nerve? It’s weird because as soon as I shifted my back slightly to my right side, it went away! And also I think it helped my legs get in extension way more too!
This is awesome too because I wore the supportive compression shorts all night?! I wonder if this made a difference? I hope it did, because my pelvic area and core have woke up tremendously!
I literally can breathe more easily, and I can feel an insane amount thru both of my legs! I was literally focusing on pushing my heels away, and I can feel my right ankle and heel more than the left. So what I did instead of forcing it, was focusing on letting my heel slip away from my body, and slowly, ever so slowly, contract my quads! I was being oh so gentle with the quad activation too! It was wild! It’s interesting too because I know at some point while doing this, I fell back asleep? Maybe only momentarily, but still, I wonder what that was about!?
My core / sides / back are very engaged and feel continuous! Quads are engaged, hamstrings relaxed, and I can feel my gastroc’s in both of my legs lighting up tremendously! It’s amazing! My whole posterior chain feels lit up! Glutes max and med are fired up too! I even feel my pelvic floor trying to sync up with everything as well!
My breath feels so much easier. I was practicing my ‘Breath of Light’ exercises, 7 inhales thru the nose, exhale thru the nose, and repeat. It’s interesting because I was really feeling my heels slide out during this breath pattern! I wonder what other good parasympathetic breathing patterns I can try to work on?!
This is wild, I really tried to “hike” the compression shorts up last night, to really give my hips some coverage! I really feel my hips a TON! I hope this made a difference! I wonder how today will go now because of this! I wonder too if this was a consolidation night after having the m on Sunday night?
My body is waking up. Slowly but surely. In these mornings it’s so cool to feel all the new activation and sensation! They are filling in so much! I feel like a little kid in a coloring book, filling in between the lines of all the muscles, nerves, fascia, in my musculoskeletal system. It really feels like it’s all coming back and filling in!
Let’s see how today goes and what I can do to fix my braces and continue the journey! I wonder what the “strut” material for the KAFO’s is, if it’s not aluminum? Hmm?
Okay time to get up! Here we go!
Wow! My left leg isn’t sweaty too!
Wow, very active quads and glutes today! Even in the chair! This was significant in terms of the amount of continuous activation I felt throughout the day! My body, also was feeling more calm in the lower left abdominal region! It’s almost like that areas “tightness” has migrated down to the quads, and glutes, and is helping create a continuous tonic activation in these muscles again? Weird, right?
As I’m working on some parasympathetic breathing, I can feel how my feet and toes are filling and feeling cooler with each breath! It’s rather remarkable, as I was driving home and noticing this!
Made it to the gym! Did a TON of back work!
Oh my goodness! I didn’t get any GERD symptoms after eating pasta?!? What is this!? Getting in the standing frame I didn’t feel like I was getting ripped apart!
Did my pelvic floor work while up in the standing frame! I’m cooked!
2/4/26 – Heavy Bag & Exo Day!
Holy smokes, my left lower abdominal area I think is really loosening up! My legs aren’t getting into extension as well as yesterday, but I can take full deep breaths in supine, and my lower left abdominal area isn’t freaking out near as much as it had in the past! This is incredible!
I wonder how the Exo will go because of this today! I have good feelings about that!
I’m gonna try to modify the braces with some pieces of steel flat stock… maybe I can get the guys to help me down in the machine shop?…
I’m wondering, these high waisted compression shorts I think are really helping!
Crazy too how these compression tops are connecting my shoulders and trunk with my pelvis! It’s been interesting expanding my understanding of the thoraculumbular fascia and the interaction between my shoulders and pelvis! I really want to learn more about the tensegrity that is our bodies!
Okay let’s get moving, shorter note for today!
I was able to get to the Gym for some cardio on the heavy bag! I was really focusing on scapular setting, and leading with my shoulders, and boy could I feel the glute activation with this round! This was great!
Walking today with Cal went great! It was definitely dark and gloomy, but each session it’s getting better and better!
The body today is cooked! The sweats in the Lowe left abdominal region, and my entire left side are intense this evening! I really must be “opening up” and letting the fascia move and body reconnect on that side!
Tired is an understatement for today…. Time for rest I am cooked!
2/5/26 – Sunny Day in California
Wow. I just had one of the most remarkable dreams that I remembered in a while! I was at a skatepark, it was a beautiful warm, sunny day, there were a ton of children out and about, and Callie was there with me. At first though, I was out by myself, and I was surprising myself with the moves I was doing, as I was practicing, and in this dream I knew I didn’t know how to do any of this! I was there specifically to practice! I was doing shove-it’s, Ollie’s, and then I started to do some other tricks I didn’t even know were possible for me to do?! It was so cool I think I felt a tre-flip in there even!
Then from the building adjacent to the skatepark, here came Callie. Instead of coming outside, she kinda hid herself in the mix of folks in there at a chair / spot on the bleachers, tucked behind some families with little kids. Immediately, I went over there, and asked her to come out and sit with me while I mess around! I came skating inside, next to some of the little kids, and I told Callie I love her. The little kids “Ooooed” and “Ahhhed” and laughed at my comment, and Callie said in her teasing voice, “you don’t love me!” And I chime back, “oh yes I do!” And take her hand and pull her outside to join me in the sun. She had a lap of yarn, and her knitting needles with her, and I told her to bring them outside and sit in the sun with me!
We went outside, I kept messing around, and Cal sat by me on a table, smiling, watchin’, and knittin’. It was a great afternoon!
Before all this we must have been on the freeway or something in California, as there was a larger kid riding a E-skateboard, down a freeway and using the truck in front of him to slow down! It was crazy!
I guess, my body and mind feel all these changes, and KNOW new opportunities are possible. My body is working so hard behind the scenes. I went to bed just soaked with sweat, yesterday really worked it out of me!
My legs were pretty (and still are) active this past night and morning supine time, and I’m feeling SO MUCH fullness in my ankles and feet! I’m feeling them being encapsulated and surrounded! Like half of my foot, not quite the whole foot! My toes feel like “sprouts” coming out of the ground, wiggling out in the morning. The sensation fades in and out.
My breath has been SO MUCH more full! I can breath very deeply into my lungs, and I am not feeling my lower left abdomen taking over! Low back, TA, QL’s, lower Lats are very engaged!
I was feeling yesterday while hitting the punching bag in the wheelchair, how much easier it was while Leading from the shoulders! Also, while extending my hips and retracting back into the chair, I did just that, led with retracting and pushing down my scapulas! It helped tremendously!
That was a great warm up before walking, got up quick for 5-10min in the standing frame, used the bathroom, and made it to the basement! I was tired! I need to tighten up the hardware on that sucker! So many things to remember with the Exo!
But my entire body feels so alive right now! In varying levels and degrees from my head to my toes, but still so much engagement! It’s pretty incredible! I can feel some tightness pulsing in my lower left QL, probably has something to do with it waking up and the lower left abdomen!?
Glutes are firing like crazy, as is my quads! There’s a lot of activation going on!
I had a thought last night, that I wanted to write about and remember, but it’s blanking in me right now…
While in the Exo while standing, I was able to do some DEEP parasympathetic breath work, and I was getting taller, was able to “hold it in” and it helped prep me before the walking bout! It was so interesting, I was timing each step with a slightly forceful exhale, exhale on left, exhale on right. This reminded me, and I was inspired, by how I hit the Heavy Bag. With each punch I take an exhale. It helps me get more force, and I notice how I’m more stable too! So maybe this is a good way to help rewire my brain and body while walking?!
This has been a great morning wake up! I’m really excited to keep the progress up, see where the Grant status is at, and keep things moving for the Handcycle! (I’m going to call it the bike moving forward).
One day at a time. That’s all we got.
Man oh man did my left leg get sweaty in the standing frame today! Pretty intense, if I’m being honest!
Guys at work with the leg braces today were so dang considerate! Those guys, those machinists, they really get it. I don’t know what it is about blue collar fellas, but they and I seem to get along so dang well. They are so human and just real folks. I don’t get any pretentiousness or anything from them, they just want to help. We need more folks like that in the world.
Pilates today was an incredible! This was the FIRST TIME I am sitting in the new cushion!!! It’s FIRM! And my body was activating so much! All the work on the wall unit was great! Got on the Cadillac, and then the reformer!
I was shook with how effortlessly my body was able to push out for some reps on the reformer! I was also getting straighter than ever! Pretty incredible, really! And when I was all done, I was absolutely COOKED! It really is a mental workout just as much as physical!
Okay, so my body is waking up… FAST…. There are some intense waves of sensation thru my body right now. I’m shook. My lower right rib/ chest area is flooding with a huge wave of sensations that are spreading into my hips, lower abdomen, and especially into my right leg! It’s crazy, it’s hot, stingy, and feels like I’m being prodded at with an intense fire rod, that has this intense ability to rush thru to other areas of my body?
I don’t know, but this new seat! Has really gotta be helping!
MY BIG TOES! AM I FEELING MY BIG TOES!? What is happening right now?! Why and how is my body responding this way right now!? It’s like a part of my spinal cord opened up and there’s this huge flood of sensation, activation, and proprioception filling in!? This is INSANE!?
I really am shook, right now. My body is feeling extremely overstimulated. I’m going to get some rest now. I really need it!
2/6/26 – New Seat Cushion!
This has been one of the most significant nights EVER for leg changes! And I gotta be honest, changing seat cushions I think was the catalyst for this! It’s pretty amazing! I can’t believe it!
I did Pilates last night with the new cushion, and I was getting some of the best movements on the wall unit ever! It was crazy how quickly my body was responding! And then, the amount of extension on the reformer, also nuts! Therese said she was holding on to my feet for dear life to keep me from jumping off the reformer!
She also said a pretty incredible thing to me, she goes, “you know Joe, you’re really lucky that you will be able to use your legs again. Not everyone has that opportunity.” And that hit me hard, because I really felt the emotion with that one! I’m really working on getting my legs back!
My feet, ankles, beds of feet, toes, lower legs, calves and shins, knees, lower quads!!! This is absolutely incredible! Callie said last night it was almost as if something in my spinal cord “opened up”?!
Wow. This is incredible. So much activation! I’ll have to be careful today, I’m not sure if my glutes or legs will fatigue out being in the new seat cushion, or if this is going to be a mental game? My legs and body has been adapting to the stimulus that I put it under, and Ashley did think I was going to be fine with the new cushion, so let’s run it and see!
Honestly it really feels so much like my legs are going to get up to try to stand! They are so much more full and strong this morning! I am not even sure what else I can do for them, except keeping on my path, and get ready for a day in the new cushion being “fidgety” and moving around a lot?! This is gonna be wild! They are waking up before my own eyes!
It’s always so interesting, feeling these new sensations and activations. Last night was INTENSE before bed. It’s a mental workout just as much as a physical one. I have been trying to get as much rest as I can. I think I tried to go to bed at 7:30pm last night! I’m trying to be consistent, each day working these legs a bit more by more. Once I get these braces modified and ready, I really think I’ll be able to do more because then I will need so much less help! Let’s see how that goes!
I feel like I want to write out a poem, my mind is racing for some reason this morning?
Mind Race
Heady thoughts. All a blur
Legs full, head a whir
I squeeze my abs, and see what I feel
All the engagement, my quads to let out their reel
When I breathe in, I wait to brace
I feel the spasm, but then a release
Where are these signals? Where do they go?
Why is it that
They have no home?
They’re working hard
And as am I
To feel my feet, my touch, my cry
These legs have so much built within
And movement keeps
Creeping more and more in
Without a sound or worry be
My body needs
To run and play
The safety that
Our legs create
And with each breath
I move them to a new state
I haven’t thought
about the path
For which I’m headed
Clearing trail
Or where I’ve gone
Steps removed
My body leads
To where we are
I keep on moving
My true North Star
I’m not gonna lie….. I feel a lot more calm now having wrote that. I have no idea where the words come from. Only that they seem to help. Better get moving for today!
Why are words so powerful? I feel like an explorer rediscovering something intrinsic in human development, that’s gone quiet?
Leg activation all day from new cushion! Can’t believe how much this new seat cushion is making my legs activate! My quads are engaged, and my hamstrings are chilling the heck out!
I called up Tim, about my new cushion support, and he had a New in-seat “rigidizer” or cushion support! So at lunch I made my way down to independence first, to see what they had! I’m gonna mess with this, this weekend!
Day off and rest after standing frame and work today. It’s been a busy week and Fridays have been a good day to get some rest in!
Both Callie and I were up till 8pm on a Friday working on our projects! We need to get dinner! We both are being goofy, and I’m definitely not a Terminal Code user, this is so interesting!
Time for rest after a long week. I’m pretty glad with all the progress for this week, on all fronts! Time for some rest!
2/7/26 – Thought Consolidation
So it’s been a pretty incredible slow wake-up, this Saturday, as I’ve been feeling and experiencing such an increase in activation!!
I’m pleasantly surprised at how this new cushion isn’t cutting into my hamstrings, and making them so tight throughout the day!
also, as I did my bathroom break last night, I did a pop-up, and noticed how much more my left abdominal area is sinking down and trying to level out with my right! It’s been a sweaty and sensation / activation packed couple days to get there, but I know this is going to be worth it in the long run!
I can feel right now, as I’m laying, the ever increase in tonic activation in my low abs, low back, glutes! I can feel the pops and shifts of my low back adjusting back to a more normal position, and I can feel the surge of life and increase in waves throughout my legs! Pretty incredible, if I’m being honest!
All my pelvic floor work, too! Is helping pay off!
I’m thinking things are slowly taking shape, and I’m really excited to see how this year progresses! I had applied to 11 grants for the Handcycle! I hope something comes back!
It’s nice to take this time in the morning, help consolidate my thoughts. it’s so interesting how this process of writing has been developing also, as my body has been healing too! It really does help me, and I’m so very excited to continue all the work on all the fronts!
I can feel when I squeeze my glutes and low back, a “pop” in my lower spinal area! Not sure if it’s lower than the lumbar region, I think it’s right in there! I’m feeling looser and more able to move around with each little pop! Also too, my legs are stepping back and forth more and more in bed as well! That spinal reflex still lives! Now I need to figure out how to tease it out in standing, not just laying!
I started a new book, Dexterity & It’s Development, by Nikolai Bernstein! This has been WILD! It was thought to not exist, and then later found, and published 25yrs after his death and finally translated to English in 1996! He wrote this way back in the 40’s! It’s honestly been fun to read, he’s taken a very different approach than most scientists for how this information is conveyed to the readers, it’s been so fascinating!
So it’s interesting how people seem to value land and location over the land where they may have originated. …
Dexterity. Dexterity. What a wild word. What a word I haven’t heard in quite some time, even though I’m actively learning this in my own body?! I wonder why this is?
So If “about 17% of the force required in running originated from the recoil of the arches of the feet, while 16% in walking comes from the Achilles tendon” (Blazevich 2011) [9] what does this say about the innervation of the fascia? How was this affected after my injury? Are these areas of my body still active? It doesn’t quite seem so?….
Support and standing on one leg… I wonder… you know I was working on half kneeling, and half kneeling support, but I kinda stopped that work.. I really could and should pick this back up! In Born to Walk, they are discussing the importance of being able to stand on one leg for gait, and truth be told, that’s right! If I’m not working on that, how can I expect to get moving?
I noticed this too, while watching Julia before, and I really noticed how she never pulled herself up on both feet. She always did it on one? And that made me curious why PT’s don’t do this more?
The sweating…. I know it has more to do than a simple autonomic response? I just am thinking about the tightness, tone, and difficulty moving, and think then about the sweating? Like all of it seems to be related?
Huh, interesting thoughts, more to come on this but it’s time to get out for dinner tonite! More later!
Works Cited
- https://positivepsychology.com/writing-therapy/
- https://www.bbc.com/news/articles/c5y9z0g7lleo.amp
- https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_W._Pennebaker
- https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Reflex
- https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC3366057/
- https://blog.nasm.org/postural-and-phasic-muscles
- https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Charles_Scott_Sherrington
- https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nikolai_Bernstein
- Born to walk – James Earl pg 43
The Astronaut on Earth 
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