6/1
Had a good morning with Callie!
Got in the pool today too!! I’m really excited to see where the pool work is headed!!! This was really cool, because Callie was helping me work on advancing my legs, one at a time! I was doing some sort of “walking” but was not fully getting my legs into extension, but that’s okay, I was really moving them! Going backwards they were moving way better than forwards! we will have to get back in here to do this again!
6/2
Another week, another set of activities to do! I have a lot to do this week, I have paperwork that needs filing, folks to speak with, work to go and do, and I haven’t even started to mention all my rehab activities yet! I have been really wanting and needing to get a little more focused with my at home routine. It’s been going well, I just know I can progress a little more if I keep it structured a bit more! I really want to start doing some calisthenic prep exercises, I have some really good feelings about them! Also, I want to get another day of Pilates scheduled as well!
My legs are feeling really cool after being in the pool yesterday! Callie and I were walking back and forth in the shallow end! She was helping pull me forward, and I was working to advance my legs! Which they were actually kinda doing! Going backwards they were doing better than forwards, and I was jumping/ bouncing up and down! They were moving on my own! I definitely needed a little help, but still! They were moving on their own!
I really am feeling how engaged and alive my legs are today. They really are taking on shape! It’s been so interesting because my core has been making some wild changes, it’s been squeezing me so tight! I tried yesterday to offset the squeeze with my own squeeze, to try to gain back voluntary control! I can feel when it’s about to happen, and I’m trying to beat it to the punch! It’s almost like these central pattern generators (CPG’s) are just uncoordinated, and what I’m working on is wrangling them, like a bucking bronco, or a wild mustang, out on the plains. It’s really interesting because the more I am doing this, the more my legs are responding. Each movement of my leg, whether it’s voluntary or not, is helping me gain back some strength, movement, and control. Let’s get focused this week, and see what happens from here?
If you had a GI tract like mine, you would probably feel the same as me right now. It’s a Monday morning and it’s already off to a not so great start. It’s not fun, to say the least. It makes everything else that much harder because I’m kinda distracted.
I notice too, how my legs respond differently as the day moves on. They want to move! They get antsy. They get stiff. I really think it’s a combination of both weight bearing extension exercises, plus reciprocal motion (like crawling). I need to maintain that cadence, I can feel it!
6/3
So! I’m lying in bed as I wake up, and my legs! My quads are alive, my glutes are alive! My outer hips, abdomen, low back and abs are too! I’m feeling my shins and calves like crazy! Also, my IT band? He seems to really have joined the party!! Even sensations in my feet are different!
To build off what I was saying yesterday evening, I really think that combination is going to be a heavy hitter. It seems to just make sense! It was funny, when I was talking to Will yesterday, I mentioned go him, “no one learned to walk by walking” and he shrugged and had a look on his face of agreement! Like, “it’s kinda true!” Everyone develops walking patterns differently, but usually (and not always) they do it without full on gait training, like an infant! I need to continue to build off this and continue my practice!
This is wild, kind of wild, my quads both my left and right quad are activate and turned on in a way that I haven’t experienced before.
I can feel how active they are this morning as I’m adjusting and moving around to get ready this morning! This left leg though is still a little jumpy but he’s trying! My lower back, low back, and abdomen is also fired up. I’m just moving around doing my daily morning routine. I’m just feeling how alive and activated everything is and it’s really cool.
Now, wondering how to make sure that I’m managing my time most appropriately. I really like this idea of upright weight-bearing extension exercises paired with reciprocal motion. So what that means is I will need to spend time or split time in the standing frame, tall sitting and down crawling/ kneel walking. I’ve been really noticing how my legs are ready to do more activity shortly or more soon after I get done with physical therapy or any other exercise or routine so I’ve been trying to pair that as well with light stretching with the ideal knee.
So, just now, I felt my heartbeat low in my abdomen, as I was under the gun and working to do my buisness. It was odd, like, I was feeling an area of sensation in a place deep inside me I’ve never felt before, I have no other way to describe it except somewhere so deep in me. It was wild?!
6/4
Wow, it’s really kinda astounding just now what I was feeling activating in my legs! In my lower legs, so my calves and tib anterior, I was feeling activating and I was getting to activate on the opposite sides of my legs?!?!
6/5
“I’m Safe”. This is what I’ve been telling my body, as I’m laying here in bed this morning. This has been helping my legs calm down so tremendously, like a flip of a switch, you would think it was magic. I always know when I need to go to the bathroom in the morning cuz my legs step and kick in place when I’m laying in bed, and this time, I told myself, “I’m Safe”. And they stopped?!? It’s so very interesting because I watched a video of a fella on Instagram, who was talking about mobility. It isn’t always about tight muscles preventing the movement, more so as it is our nervous system inhibiting the movement. Actually what’s interesting is that this would mean that inhibitory signals are not being sent?! But if I actively tell my body, “I’m safe” I think I just found a sure fire way to send inhibitory signals, that are making there way to my legs!! This is huge because I’ve been trying so long to be able to send more inhibitory signals voluntarily to my legs, and for some reason this clicked!!!?!
So, it’s been a long day. I had to try to get back to sleep to get caught up a little bit more on some sleep. That’s usually a hard one for me to fit into the day, and I have so much to do, I fall further and further behind as the week goes on. Sometimes that’s tough. Either way, I keep on moving!
So, today was a Pilates day! Goodness gracious, these are good days and sessions that involve so much movement, for my whole body! I sat and was doing some exercises in what is called the, ‘Baby Chair’ and I’m not gonna lie, I was very excited to do the arm exercises not in the wheelchair! It was pretty cool being able to sit in front of the mirror, removed from the chair for a bit. It was just me, just Joe. Nothing else. It felt really good. This left shoulder is always being a bit of a menace, and it was great to be able to keep it in position with the visual feedback I was getting from the mirror!
The time on the Reformer was wild! This was legitimately my best session yet on it! My legs are pushing out more and more, and in so many ways possible! Therese likes to reiterate, “pushing out from the core” and it’s such a hard way for me to understand, but I’m sure I can get it if I keep moving and attempting! I’m really trying, and she has so much faith! Slowly but surely these legs are pushing out more and more! She also said I was pushing out on 4 springs, which is 100lbs?! That was crazy! I wasn’t pushing out much, but it was still something! Got start somewhere with every movement!
6/6
Neuromotor Coordination (or Sensorimotor Integration) this is the idea I’m looking to explore more, to help rebuild my Central Pattern Generators (CPG’s). I really like to know the Neuro side of my healing, because it helps me rebuild from the inside out. It’s been interesting listening to how Therese in Pilates describe the movement patterns I’m learning as the same idea, from the inside out! Honestly there really is something to it. Allowing our body to learn, from the inside out. Not forcing it to do something, but facilitating an environment and space to do so. I was really pleased with the motion I was getting from Pilates yesterday, and honestly, it was wild how much my legs were moving! I feel like they are still tired/ engaged this morning from it all!
So for some reason, I haven’t really put a ton of attention into what contracting my abdomen does, while I’m seated or standing. For a minute there, I thought they weee there to crunch me forward, and do a sit up, but it turns out after Callie had told me that it helps her sit up straighter, I really had to slow down and realize there is really something here with the abs that I did not know before!
7/7
My feet have had such a change! My shins, ankles, top and bottom of feet, and toes, are all lighting up!! I took it easy yesterday, so I will need to get back into it today! I was really happy with how I was trying to keep my abdomen contracted for longer while moving around! I feel like I hadn’t fully realized how our abs are supposed to work?! Crazy, but I guess that’s the reality of it all. I don’t have all the details of the muscles that worked fine with out me thinking about it, but now, I really need to be thinking more critically about these muscles I didn’t need to think about!
Time to make the most of today! I need to get moving!
You can’t rely on these rods.. you need to treat your body and muscles like they aren’t even there. I feel like you have been trying and attempting to do that, but just haven’t put any words to that yet. really, I noticed this yesterday when I was flexing my abs and was moving so much better than I usually do while moving down the street. I need to keep my core engaged, until he’s ready to do it on his own! I’m looking at the different types of movement that our abdomen does:
- Twisting at waist; also bending to the side,
- Squeezing abdomen during forceful exhalations, defecation, urination, and childbirth
- Sitting up
- Bending to the side
And I can’t help but realize, that I need to get these done in a certain order. I think the second one on the list, is probably first.
Okay, so, how can I turn a crawling exercise/ routine, into a bit of a cardio routine? I want to incorporate the reciprocal motion, into a cardio exercise as well? I guess that means just crawl for more and more steps and build up more and more endurance? Seems so simple, might as well give it a go!
So, the 100 (Pilates) is a pumping exercise to wake up our abs??? Is that it?? Also, I think after I get done on the floor, I’m going to get up in the standing frame, to give my legs information that this is where they need to be and this is how they are to be useful, upright, standing, holding me.
It’s just wild, you would think that this would all…. Hmm…. Well then! It appears I lost my thought with where this thought is going, I’ll have to take a break now for the day. It’s been a long week, and I’m not sure what else I could possibly do for the day, time for some rest.
I need to keep raising money for the exoskeleton! I really want to try to get this in time for the wedding in September! It’s a long way to go, but I need to keep trying! One day at a time! I really need to help keep spreading awareness on this, to help spread the message!
The Astronaut on Earth 
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