3/2
Dang. Paul just left this morning. He had something really nice to say, and that was, “Hey, you know where you’re going. You know what you’re doing. You’re getting these legs working, but be happy with the process. Let yourself be happy, Joe.” And I say, “where did you learn that?” And he goes, “I think I thought it while taking a poop or something, I’m not sure. But do your best to be happy. And be nice to Callie.”
I do suppose sometimes I have a hard time having a good time these days. It’s just so dang difficult sometimes in this chair, and I don’t want to allow myself to get “comfortable” in it and stop my progress. I guess I’ve built up enough momentum in my exercises and physical aspects I don’t have to worry about that, but I kinda need to trust the process and enjoy the time that I have. I did have a conversation the other day with momma, where she said basically the same thing. “Sometimes people are always trying to get from the next season to next, they want it to be warm out too soon, and then in that process, they don’t enjoy the time they have. time already flies by fast enough, why not enjoy the time you have right now?” And when she said that, I was like, “wow, you’re right mom.” I really see it. It’s hard to sometimes, and around certain people, but I get it. I gotta try.
I guess, it’s funny how we have these moments, these moments of realization and greater depth and insight to what we are doing. I guess I really have a good time with my siblings and family. and I miss that. They mean the world to me. I would prefer to be able to be more apart of their lives than not. It’s just hard sometimes having to be so far from them all. We all just get along and click really well on the things we do together. I will have to see what I can do about this!
I seriously woke up with the most sensation in my legs to date. All the creases and nooks and crannies that are in our legs, I really am feeling them more significantly everywhere throughout my legs than I have up to date! My toes and feet are having a warm feeling, my ankles and calves! It’s amazing! Even up into my low back, abdomen, obliques, hips, glutes, low abdomen! My quads and hamstrings (which are still nice and tight) to my knees, calves, and the beds of my feet!
I hadn’t taken a lot of notes this weekend because we were just so busy! Hard to always make time for everything! We didn’t even make it to the gym together! We said that was something we were going to do!
Also, that’s been a big revelation too this week, not looking down all the time! It’s better for my posture and neck, and also I feel so much more balanced when I keep my head up!
Weird to think it’s already March. Goodness gracious! I definitely need to get some free weights for home to do the shoulder work both my PT’s and Therese talked about! This floor session was great! These past couple nights in the standing frame have been really helpful for getting my muscles to fire!
This weekend was great. I was really glad Paul was able to make it. I feel more and more connected with those guys, With each passing day. It’s just been made more and more prevalent to me when I hangout with them like this. All three of them. I sure do like having these guys in my life. I just wish I was around them more to be able to see them more often. It’s weird how life takes us in the ways it does, and spreads people out so much. It’s a pretty fascinating idea, if I’m being honest. Really though, these guys have had such an impact on me, in my entire life, but also this past year or so. Really no one has been closer to me except for them, not considering Callie or my folks. I miss em. I’ll have to see what I can do about this.
3/3
My ankles, shins, feet, and knees are feeling so much this morning!!! This was such a significant change!!! Idk what this was, but it’s amazing!!! My legs are laying flatter and flatter in supine, my low back is engaging with my glutes, my hamstrings are relaxing and firing more like they should!! This should be a good week of progress, I’m excited to see what this week brings!! Until then! Time to get up!!
So, today’s been a busy day! I’ve definitely felt more connected with my posture, keeping my shoulders down and back, my head up, quads, core, and glutes engaged! The sensations through my feet and ankles have been sky high, and balance has been off the charts! I just need to make sure I’m dealing with having to go to the bathroom in a reasonable time, that really helps keep things under control.
Standing, standing upright with no chest support, standing with no knee blocks. These are a couple milestones I need on my way to walking. I really need to continue to work on both unsupported knee standing, as well as unsupported chest too.
Suzuki method? Hmm I’ll have to do some research on this!
Ok, so they say, “Write down an ability you think is reasonable, or just beyond, to achieve 1) within a month, 2) by the end of the year, and 3) after 3-5 years. Then, list two intermediate skills you know are required for each goal.”
Hmmm one month, eh?
1. Can I hold myself up in tall kneeling with no hand support?
A) hold myself up with 1 hand
B) get my glutes and back extensors to get me out of flexion
2. Can I pull one leg through into half kneeling?
A) pull upper leg/ hip forward
B) extend knee into extension
3. Can I hold my torso up in the standing frame with no chest support?
A) hold myself up with 1 hand
B) feel balanced with my left hand raised
1 year
2. Stand Up next to Callie (with no support) at the wedding
A) get quads and glutes strong enough to support my weight
B) get trunk connected to lower body to keep hips in extension
3-5 years
3. Walking
A) initiating hip and knee extension for swing phase
B) stability of glutes and quads for stance phase
I’ll continue to review these goals, and keep them fresh in my mind! Really, I gotta hit these smaller milestones first before walking, so let’s keep our focus! It’s so easy to loose track, but let’s keep the small goals in mind to achieve the larger!
3/4
Today has been interesting, it’s 6:15pm. Wait, it’s 6:23pm now. I’m in the standing frame, doing some arm exercises with my ankle weights! I’m trying to figure out if I want to buy a free-weight set. It would be for in the standing frame, and the floor. It’s interesting because the gym is right downstairs! But my body is needing to do these exercises in these different positions. So, I’ll stick with these 5lb ankle weights for now! I’ll have to see what I can do in the near future!
“Getting Stronger Everyday” was the way I had told Jeff at work how I’m actually doing, because I had a thought, “why do I always tell people, “not so bad” or “it’s going” or “it’s hard”?” As in, why do I always tell people more or less about how hard things are? And not instead about some progress? So I said to myself to try to change things up. That’s what came out?! I was honestly surprised myself! Which was kinda wild, in all honesty. It really sums up what I’m doing and trying to achieve, plus it frames up every conversation a bit different!
I’ve had a bit of a day. I was thrown out of whack pretty good by the later start to my day. Which started from the poor nights rest. Which came from the fact I hadn’t gotten to move around much throughout the day. See, it’s always or, I should say, there is always a reason for the way we feel, and I’m trying to stay in tune with myself. It really helps.
I’m laying in bed, supine, and my body is relaxing! I need my left obliques/ abdominals to quit over reacting. I can slowly start to feel that area in my mid section slowly starting to act up. I’m not a fan of that. So I’m slowly trying to breathe diaphragmatically, to get my abs to relax.
Time to get some rest, it’s been a long day!
3/5
Goodness gracious!!! It’s been incredible today, wow, I am really putting these concepts together really well!!! I cannot believe it all sometimes, these legs really are getting stronger everyday! I’m feeling so much more throughout my lower legs!! This has been an exponential increase down there, these fellas really want to go! I’m struggling to slow down and be able to capture all the new activities, sensations, and ideas that are coming together!!! Shoot, right now even I’m getting ready to go pee and I’m legitimately almost kinda peeing my pants!!?!
So these lower legs sky rocketed in sensations this morning! I woke up with my compression pants on, and the sensations were incredible! I wasn’t expecting that after wearing them overnight! I’ve gone the day now without wearing them, and the sensations still are off the charts! This is great! My ankles too, the proprioception in them is very much on the rise! Today at therapy I was very much feeling the rocking of my ankles and shifting of weight, it was incredible!
Floor time and crawl time this morning went really well! I’m getting so much straighter in tall kneeling, I really need to keep pushing myself forward to get my both hands off for no support! I also did something different this time, and pulled off my chair’s seat, to sit on while on the floor! Turns out that cushion was a bit better equipped for long duration sitting than the blue pad I’ve been using! It was also a good challenge getting off, moving it across the floor, and into position! It was also a good little challenge moving it back to the chair on my own!
Therapy with Ashley today went really well! We did BFR in the parallel bars, Talking about book! BFR! Prone hip extensions! These went so well! I’m excited to try these again! Talking about goals! And how I need to set some of these intermediate ones first, which she was all into!
Barteniff principles, this is another subject for another time! I’m excited for the book on this!
Sensations have been off the charts today, especially after therapy! They’re so relaxed, and feeling so much more significant with every little movement and adjustment! Time to eat some dinner!
Made some adjustments to the wheelchair, turns out they need kinda sorta constant attention. All the more reason to keep up with the work on my body! I’m also down on the floor stretching my body out, and trying to lay prone, and my hips and knees are getting pretty flat with no assistance or anything from me! Scratch that, that was short lived. Left hip flexor kinda needs to chill out!
My body is opening up so much! I’m glad to have gotten some time to stretch out today!
3/6
Turns out that a good session of Pilates isn’t enough. I’m down on the floor right now, at 7:29pm. It’s not enough to just workout for 1 hour a day for me. I gotta keep it up for these legs each day! Just a little more each day is really what I gotta do!
What’s wild is how much the sensation, pressure, warmth is all changing in my legs. It’s pretty remarkable, really. I’m really working to get my body stretched, straight, and so much more elongated than ever before.
I’ve been on the floor for a bit, and I’m completely, utterly, and entirely worn out. These days are long for me, inside and out. I really have long days that are not the easiest to navigate, but I can’t help but feel it’s helping.
Pilates today was incredible. I was able to move my legs on the Wunda Chair, and I was astounded!!!! This was incredible! My glutes are really going!!!!!
My legs have seriously made such a drastic change from all the pumping I was doing with my legs! The compression pants too, have helped sensation and awareness sky rocket! It’s amazing!!! I’m really glad with today! More of this next week forsure!!
3/7
Wow goodness! My legs are really filling out each morning, bit by bit! I’m always having a good time each morning exploring where my body is going with new sensations, new activation, and more feeling.
I definitely can’t lay here too long, since I really have to go! That sensation is constantly increasing with each day! I’m truly feeling an expansion of my legs with each night I rest with these compression pants on. It’s very fascinating to me? Is this from increased blood flow? Better nerve transmission? It’s very interesting, I will keep exploring this!
Oh my goodness!! Getting into the car today, my legs instinctively went to get on the ground, off the foot plate to help me up!!
This is seriously so wild! I’m on the floor, my body is moving so much, my hips and low back are really filling in!! I can feel myself trying to pull my legs forward and pull myself more and more upright! it’s truly amazing! I also had a thought, “how do infants go from crawling on all fours, to being able to pull a leg forward, to get into a half kneel?” I’ve been thinking about this, and attempting it myself, and can’t help but wonder if I’m missing something?
Goodness these legs really activating so much! They are constantly showing up and being there for me!
3/7
I was really making some great strides on the floor, and then got a little distracted by the phone! Ha! My posture is getting so much better, my entire back is engaging so much more each weight shift, and honestly it feels so much more significant when I get up from the floor! It’s great!
It was an interesting conversation today with Joey and Evan! Joey was talking about the Strider kick bike, and how that greatly helped Jordy’s development to be able to get up and pedal a bike by the time he was 3! He was talking about balance, and how that is the hardest part of riding the actual bike. This got me thinking about the assistive devices, and how they do not help allow for the development of that function?
“Eccentric actions as a braking effect” this is an interesting idea because there is a lot of control that comes with eccentric movements. I’m glad this is something Ashley has been helping me work on in therapy as well!
What if you aren’t actually forgetting things, but you never actually fully “remember” and built out a method or map in your brain to remember what it is you are learning? Huh, crazy thought?!
I feel like, right now I was just able to contract my entire trunk and lower mid section. And then I just relaxed it?
3/8
Wow, goodness. Did I sure have some fun ideas to think about this morning, I’m trying to take a minute and capture them all on paper quick…..
And, turns out I didn’t get a chance to write about them at this time, because I got so wrapped up in just living and maintaining this behemoth of a body! It really needs a lot, and I’m constantly at its beck and call. It makes for a tough time sometimes, but as I was saying, I am getting stronger everyday. I gotta keep that in mind other wise it’s really easy to just let these ideas slip through the cracks. More on all this later, this should do for now. Wish me luck!
The Astronaut on Earth 
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