11/17
Waking up, and taking moments to collect my thoughts really helps me throughout my day. Laying and getting straighter? Yep. Sensations in upper thighs, inner thighs, lower legs increasing? Yep. It’s been really nice being able to take fuller and fuller breaths from my diaphragm. The diaphragmatic breathing is getting better with each day as well! I really have been incorporating getting my feet on the floor more and more and more! I really liked the thoughts about isometric holds vs eccentric and concentric loading as well, I think there’s more to expand on from there! Baby steps.
Isometric holds makes me think of the first place that our muscles gain function. By being able to at the very least contract and hold when we need to, I am moving in the right direction towards full voluntary motion! Let’s continue this type of work!
So I just worked through a huge set of information for a quadruped routine, and workouts I can do in the chair. I think that’s been one of my limiting factors in therapy, is strength in the quads and the glutes. They need a lot of work, and I think by incorporating more chair and floor workouts into my day, I can benefit greatly at therapy by having worked them out already! It’s tough too, to work through hip flexor tightness in this chair, but I think that’s something I am managing better and better!
Okay, so this new floor routine in the quadruped position is working out really well! I’m really excited to keep progressing! My quads are engaged, my glutes are engaged, and now after being off the floor, my legs are sooo relaxed!! This is great! I need to work this in on my weekdays now!
So I’m almost wondering, if the engagement and “tightness” I’m feeling is all being confused in my head. Like, is it good or bad? It’s funny, because as I’m talking this through in my head, I almost immediately thought to myself, “of course, this is good”. It’s weird, for so long I feel like I keep having mixed thoughts and feelings about it.
I’m trying lateral raises with my legs and feet on the ground, I wanted to give this a go! I’m doing my routine a bit different, with my feet on the floor! It’s really interesting because I can feel how much more my legs are engaging when I’m doing these exercises!
I’ve been thinking. What really is the difference between isometric contractions over a smaller range of motion, and this muscle tonus? You might say one is voluntary vs involuntary, but is that it?
11/18
So, I’ve been thinking about Hope. Thinking about what it does to us, and how when we are hopeful to other people, what it does to them. It really is a wonder. I really don’t think this is an idea that we truly understand, or even fully grasp the power for what it can create.
Today at therapy, there is a young fella named let’s say Mitchell, who has a few things that affect him. He was working with the therapist and student when we walked up, and for some reason, the feeling came over me to smile, look up at him, and say, “Come on Mitchell! You got it!” And he looked up and forward, started counting off, and starting moving forward! It was really amazing to see him make so much progress after I just helped cheer him on for that little bit! It really is amazing. I will have to learn more about this!
So today at therapy was great! I was whooped! Started out on the treadmill with Joni, and my legs had felt the most like legs I had been feeling to date! That was really awesome! I hope Joni makes it to Vanguard!
Now with Rose and Kennedy, I started on my belly, laying prone. This helped stretch me out sooo much! We did some really wild things today. Get my hips more and more open and helped stretch my abdomen out as well!
The way I feel right now is incredible. Truly and honestly, it’s amazing! My legs have made a huge set of development today! I need to keep using them! Throughout the day, getting them more and more active is really what I need to be doing!
These quads are getting very engaged. They’re hungry. And hungry for more action! I need to help them! I was able to move around pretty dang well today! My abdomen really needs to get stretched. He’s so tight! But I can feel him loosening up!
I’m needing some good rest. My body is pooped. That’s about all I have to say for today.
11/19
Wow, today’s busy. It’s 8:22pm and I’m finally at the gym! This has been a crazy day and my legs are seriously doing more and more!!! There’s so much going on. I don’t even know where to start.
My legs have really been activating today. I was glad I got in the standing frame twice at work, dude my leg routine throughout the day. Ended up being a longer day at work but a good day overall. Busy and good day for the legs.
My hips and legs have really had an uptick in filling out today, my outer glutes/ hips are really engaging consistently throughout the day! It’s been awesome! My abdomen too hasn’t been so tight, he’s been so much more helpful! I just laid down in bed and it feels like I just unlocked a part of my abdomen I haven’t had access to this period of time? It’s interesting, I don’t understand why, but it’s really wild.
My body just needs to keep moving forward, and to do that, I need rest. I’m out for tonite.
11/20
Fuller breaths with no spasms? Yes please. Hips filling out? Legs filling out? How about my lower back too? And my thighs? There’s a certain warmth to them all as well. My shins as well are taking in some other feelings. My feet have a multitude of sensations and my arches! Oh boy! They are really livening up! I woke up last night and thought to myself, you ready to do some sketchy things, Joe? I feel like with each increase of sensation and feeling, it gives me a little more confidence to try something a little riskier or different! Let’s find out and see how today goes!
Today was a day. A long one. Good day at therapy, and then made it to Vanguard too!
11/21
So I’ve had a day where I’ve just constantly been dragging. It’s all caught up with me. One thing after another.
So what’s interesting is how my entire back is firing. Everywhere even down low, my back is contracting. Same thing with my glutes, and my quads! But back to my back. It’s really interesting when I get off the chair and try to stand, my entire back now is completely engaging. The tricky thing, is something that’s here. It’s the rods. These things are always present. Always there. I can’t get away from them. It’s really kinda scary sometimes. Like, I know how my body can move, and should move, and I have something inside of me that isn’t letting me do that. It feels more weird than anyone could ever know. It’s not fun.
I bring this up because I am really happy about my muscles working hard to contract! But it’s simultaneously really hard to get them to contract the right way when these rods are there. They really are learning to have to work in very different ways. It’s really spooky.
As im getting up into the standing frame, I get about halfway up and my body makes some really interesting movements. I feel my abdomen, legs, back spasm. Like my legs are trying to get up to stand, but don’t know where to get the signals through to. It’s also really difficult to breathe in these positions. I feel my glutes and quads engaging, my calves and lower legs engaging as well. It’s really interesting. My abdomen is moving in such a wild way while I’m up. My breath is so connected with all this as well. I really feel my body changing. I feel the changing occurring from the top down.
11/22
So as I’m on the FES bike, feeling my quads, hamstrings, glutes, tibials, and calves contract, it’s really cool how much more significant I am feeling them contract at the right times they should be!
I’m at the gym, and doing 40lb single arm bent over rows! This is huge! It’s incredible how well my legs were helping hold me up! I am really trying to be more and more aware of them. Every opportunity is a chance to know they are there.
11/23
This has been a pretty good night, and a good morning of sensations! My hips, Glutes, quads are very active this morning! The interesting thing I did last night was get my legs on the floor, and kinda shake and bounce and wiggle around with my feet planted! It was really cool! My legs were really activating! Now it reminded me of how a baby is always wiggling, and bouncing around! If they are doing it subconsciously, maybe I should be doing this consciously to help activate the same neural pathways!? Just getting movement going is always good, in any form, so why would this be any different?
It’s all just consistency. Seems to apply for any and everything. How can I consistently use my legs more each day? That’s the question I need to keep asking myself! I’m getting them on the floor, and trying to keep them on and off, but what else can I do?
Doing some of my modified leg and trunk exercises first thing in the morning in the chair. I figure, if I get my legs moving first thing in the morning, I should be better off getting them to relax and engage throughout the day if I start in the morning.
So made it on the floor, ate some lunch, and am at the gym! I’m doing more and more exercises with my feet on the floor! It’s almost like the more I use them, the more I can use them? It’s weird, it’s not fatigue, but it’s the opposite, like I’m strengthening the signals each time I use them so I am able to use them more? I feel like my legs are feeling more just from me saying this! Seems wild but that’s what I’m feeling!
We had a wonderful night over at Bruce and Luis’ place! This was a great night to round things out for the week, and they kept us up too late! Maybe I’ll even get to tag along for some Pilates! We will have to see what’s in store! More to come later! This was a good busy week, and I’m thankful for that. Now to see what this next day and week will bring!
The Astronaut on Earth 
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