June 9th – June 15th 2024: “KNOULDERING!”

6/9

Wow, what a great day! Got to see my little pupper, that big ole floof! Did some crawling and laying in the sun! It was a really well spent day with the family, and just relaxing and enjoying everyone’s company.

6/10

Alright, so this morning I had one of the toughest goes I have ever had, to date. It felt awful. It was so debilitating, feeling that way. I just wanted it all to end. So exceedingly bad.

What happened was, I was feeling so demotivated, depressed, and extremely worn down from a weekend of festivities, and also being really out of sync from my daily activities. Not being able to do your regular bodily functions when and where you usually do them, threw me off so bad. Especially because I wanted to be doing everything else but spending time going to the bathroom, or showering, or making a long trek to go and do the business. It was hard. And the other problem of it all, is that everyone wanted to help me with this so bad, but there is not so much you can do.

On the road. Taking my notes, and thinking. So many thoughts. So much going on. So many feelings. So many emotions. It’s truly been a wild ride, this past weekend, and carry that out, to these past couple weeks.

Well that was an interesting observation, we just drove by a Gary police officer smoking a cigarette while on duty. That was interesting. I just noticed in the gas station how the signs the fed’s requested for cigarettes causing a multitude of issues was posted.

The drive home I didn’t force myself to drive the whole way, turns out I have a second person who can drive at doesn’t mind doing that! So, we swapped halfway, and we made decent time back to Milwaukee!

6/11

Well, what’s interesting is last night I brought a piece of mail inside. It was my bill from the past year from Froedtert. It was 91 pages long. The first 5 pages were from the first day only. And I had to start looking up what some of the things were that I was given. Norepinephrine, fentanyl, ketamine, etc. you name it, it was on there. Turns out, the bill has listed over $100k in screws in my back…. Which is absolutely wild.

I have been glad to get back to my schedule and routine of things, it’s really hard for me when I get thrown out of that schedule, my body is just a bit sensitive, you could say. One day at a time.

6/12

The personal struggle between working on walking and the development of your world around you is really interesting. This is something I know I cannot slow down or ease up on, just one day at a time. That’s about all I can make sure I am doing.

6/13

So, I was working on doing some interesting adjustments when I was hitting the Heavy Bag. After my one minute of intense exercise, I take the 30 seconds and I try to get my arms up, and above my head. I really have been doing this so much better! My upright balance is getting a lot better, and my lower abdomen is really kicking into gear! I am really liking what is happening seemingly very quickly when I work on the heavy bag! My body responds really well to this!

6/14

Today was TIRING

My legs did some amazing things today!! I did some Kneel-Climbing, and my legs saved the day for me! This was amazing!

So, I went over to Jake and Carley’s by myself this time, and it’s been a great opportunity for me to work on just doing and existing by myself! So I grab my lil stool, and head in!

Jake and I discuss what we are gonna do, doing a lil projecting if you will, and add another hold over in the wall. What I come up with is Jake helped me thru the first route by helping keep my left leg from going into flexion at my hips! This was huge because I was actually stepping with my knees! Just one lil knee step at a time! And I’m KNOULDERING!

I ended up doing 2 more sets back and forth! And I was freaking exhausted! This was so cool and this was also the best my legs had felt in such a long time! My lower legs were feeling so much after I did this! I was really my body on my own! Just me and the wall! I’m glad the wall was a bit overhung because this helped me get super straight! Lots of cross-lateral movement when I am doing this! My body isn’t doing it super well or anything yet, nothing crazy fast, but I’m still moving, and I’m still doing it!!

Time to make it back for dinner!

6/15

“Sleepless nights, restless seats, Wherever you go, the night repeats” is a bit of an emotion. I do think about that picture, and what it could all represent?

It’s been a wild past month, with everything that has happened and is going to take on as well. I’m just really happy to be able to bear witness to it all, and still be here to see and think. It’s been so much, and sometimes when I have such a hard time sleeping, my mind can go off in a million different directions, like that caption. Either way, I’m glad I can work on this still, and happy to still be here.